missing words

If the words
are missing
let my actions
speak
volumes
chapter by chapter
I unfold before you

sending you images
hoping
to conjure
a smile

bringing you
medicine
doctors
and
smoke

a flower
against the wall
searching always
for the sun

are you ever afraid of death?
afraid of blinking out of existence
like a lightbulb
burnt out
forgotten

a mind awash with thought
like so many dried leaves
in a pond
brackish water
and the stench of decay

fear consumes me
like ants on picnic scraps
picking clean the bones of hope

Tomorrow
 seems
far off tonight
a thousand sunrises
lay


between


tonight


and



dawn

conversation

All day long I waited for your call.
Then when night has fallen, you call me.
Though by then, I am busy.
My life continues on with or without you.
Though I miss you
like a flower that misses the sun
on a cloudy day.
Yet, I snipped the bud of our conversation
before it could bloom
just to prove to myself
that I could.

will your heart come calling?

I give you too much affection
but know not where your heart has gone
does it wander in the desert?
dry, desolate, alone.
Or will it come a'calling?
to call my heart its home.

Yes, will your heart come calling?
and call my heart its home.

connection

your blue eyes
are as distant
as your voice
on the phone
barely a whisper
your breath
in my ear
thoughts
that can't escape
your mouth or mind

longingly
craving a connection
the static between us
breaks down the line

Paths

you light my heart up

make my face beam 

trip up my breath in my throat

leave me dizzy with anticipation.

Yet, I feel your fear

like a knife at my heart

and I am wounded

afraid that you will cut me open

spill my insides to the ground. 

Around you my mind whirs

I am running and look to see you beside me

we are climbing through a jungle of ideas

finding meadows of contentment 

rolling in the grass of our thoughts

but judgements come 

like storm clouds

obscuring the sun 

controlling the progression of our day

as the path darkens before us

lighting torches to find a new way

my mind is a swirl of contradiction

shall I continue on this path with you

or blow this fire out?